Who Needs The Right Fiance When You Have The Right Ring?

I don’t know why I preface my blogs with caveats, because I can never hit all of the, “but what if…” scenarios. In this case, I’m speaking specifically of one event, with one person, and the situation she’s in, and the irony.

I say this because while I’m speaking of one person, I know this CAN BE a phenomenon. And it’s maddening.

That said, let’s do this!

I have a friend who somewhat recently found out her boyfriend was cheating on her. With multiple girls, across multiple occurrences. His excuse? She was being a bitch during that time and he needed someone who wasn’t. So he stuck his dobber in a bunch of randos.

Can we pause to say how disgusting this is, people? I mean, really. One in three people has some type of STD/STI. And many cheaters (and closeted gay men) don’t use condoms because having/using a condom is often a sign of premeditation. If it’s all “in the moment” then it’s not as guilt-causing. And if it’s all in the moment, then who has a condom? This is spontaneity, people! But, I digress.

Stop Lying to Yourself, Others

I’ve had several months where I can sum it up only by saying, “Lying is awful.” People lie. All. The. Time. I’m astounded. Whether they’re lying to themselves, each other, through omission or misleading. It’s all lying. Will I occasionally say, “I’m tired” when I’m pissed off? Yes, but primarily because people don’t respect you when you say, “I’m in a bad mood and don’t want to talk about it.” Hey, if they didn’t ask, I wouldn’t even tell them I’m in a bad mood. Because it’s also my pet peeve when someone randomly throws out there, “I’m SOOOO mad!” And then won’t share the story. If I ask them if they’re upset and they say, “Yes, but I don’t want to talk about it.” I actually respect that. Usually I’ll follow up with, “If you’re ever ready, I’m here.”

But I digress. Because these are hardly the lies I’m talking about.

My point is I’m so fucking sick of lying, liars, and lies. Whether it’s the friend lying to half the group, but being (sort of) honest with the rest, it’s selfish. Is it fair half the group knows and the other doesn’t? No. Especially when you’re having sex in the shower at a party. Ridiculous. And here’s another piece of advice: If you’re having sex in the shower with someone at a party, IT’S NOT FUCKING PRIVATE! So don’t go doing it then act like we’re the assholes for talking about it. If you want it to be private, do it in your own home, at a hotel, in your car on a dirt road. But for fuck’s sake, don’t be hooking up with people at parties and expect it to be private.

I’m also sick of people lying by omission. It’s so insulting. If you’re doing something, own it. Don’t lead me to believe you aren’t. Because when I find out, my respect for you goes down the toilet. Are you welcome to be private about stuff? Sure. But when you come to me bitching about a situation that you’re allegedly a saint in, then I find out you’re actually instigating the source of your misery… That’s low. You’re low.

And last but not least, don’t lie to yourself. Don’t convince yourself something’s OK to do, or that what you’re doing isn’t wrong. You might be able to convince yourself you’re being on the up-and-up. But let me tell you, those of us who aren’t buying your lies to yourself see you as otherwise.

Did you know last week marked “National Tell The Truth Day.” Yup, CNN told me. Look, it’s best to be honest with yourself and everyone around you. Those that matter don’t mind, and those that mind don’t matter. Live it, own it.

And if you’re doing something even your best supporters WOULD mind about, and you think it’s necessary to lie… Maybe you simply shouldn’t be doing it. I dunno, just a thought.

I apologize for the swearing. If you can’t tell, I’m a little fed up.